I’m in two leagues because I really enjoy creating offensively humorous team names and that gives me double the opportunity to indulge myself. But this year, both phone apps started showing player pictures everywhere. IDGAF what anybody looks like, only how many imaginary internet points they get me.

These dumb players should spend less time getting hair and makeup done to create their profile pics, and more time getting me more imaginary internet points. Unless they are on somebody else’s team, then they should definitely spend more time getting hair and makeup done, in addition to engaging in risky and dangerous behaviour, like chainsaw juggling while riding a unicycle on a tight rope over a shark tank, or something.

Also, Yahoo keeps egging me on to do a daily game for more monies. No, I don’t want to do that. Stop asking.

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Bah humbug.