Now I just want to clarify that I don't want to get myself banned from here and I'm not trying to say that I actively hate any particular group of people or any particular group or organization associated with Gawker Media. I love all the people here so I don't want to single them out, or throw any vitriol towards them, or even make them think they're wrong for a second. But, I'm going to share some heavy stuff here and I wouldn't be surprise if it results in my universal Kinja posting privileges being revoked, or even worse. And I'm going to tell you upfront right here: it even includes the possibility of no longer being alive. Something that right now I don't mind. Hell it might even be good for society. Something I've been looking forward to for a very large chunk of my life, even you can say most of my life.
Now before you go on and call the suicide helplines, read the whole thing (it's very long, so apologies in advance), because I know I just worded that exactly as a suicide note but I do not plan on killing or harming myself in any way, let alone harming others. I've made it through a few decades pretty ok so I'm pretty sure I can continue on.
First of all I've written quite a few write-ups that made it to the FP, and even more that didn't but made Best of OppoLock or received almost universally good comments, so I'd like to know how I'm doing. Could I use a little refinement in my writing style? What do I need to improve? Any attitude adjustments? I'd like to know how I can be more fair to the community and to everyone, FP staff, commentators etc.
Anyway I might as well get to my point and talk about what started all this. So I read this article (yes it's a Jezebel article as you can see). I can't say I'm very happy about it. I know, I know, here comes a wave of boo-hoos and grow ups and I should check my white male privilege (except I'm not white so there). I just honestly feel very sick and tired of feeling marginalized for being male, and expecting to take it and like it precisely because I'm a male. This is in no way an indictment against Jezebel - I very sincerely hope you ladies keep doing what you're doing and fight the good fight - but I feel like I'm being told that I should take a mallet and use it to keep hitting my penis until it tears off (and I'm very tempted to actually do that, for real). But I suppose I should introduce some background to that, because it's an issue more complicated than "I read an article on a Gawker site and it makes me so mad I want to rage-quit life itself." Because - and it doesn't excuse Nick for being a fucking creeper, but - it fucking sucks when you're on the receiving end of it, which has happened to be more than once.