I’m searching for the next truck because Mrs. Grind says I need to search for the next truck. For anyone to do the same they would find what I found; an internet full of assholes telling everyone else what a truck is and is not. Without stating the obvious, what else did I expect from the Internet? It became clear that Honda has built exactly what every person wants in a truck, but will not buy because it’s not what they think they want.

(Note: you may not like my rant, but I’m factually correct, even if Billy Bob doesn’t like it. But, deep down inside, where he keeps his secret love of kittens, he knows I’m right. Sniff.)

Despite the amazing features that it brings to the table, some mouth breather will state the first asshole comment. “How’s it do in a mud hole with a load in the bed? No thanks! My f-150 can blahblahBLAH blah....all day loooong giggity....whoo!”

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Well, great. Obviously our schools are in dire need of funding. 90% of all 4wd optioned on trucks and suv’s has never been turned on. The most requested option on the Ford Explorers of the past is the skid plate. I know the fantasy exists of the mean and amazing off roader Baja trophy truck or rock crawler from the cover of magazines. Shoot, it explains the monster drink stickers and flat hats everywhere, not to mention the street racer wannabes filling craigslist with failed experiments. But what folks should look at the Ridgeline and think for once, is that this truck is for what they really need. I’m hauling branches and leaves to the dump, outsized furniture to wherever it goes next, moving my daughters into college, moving my daughters out of college, moving them back home after college... And not once am I having to do that up a 30% grade of logging roads with 3 tones of cinder block in the bed. Who the fuck really does that anyway? F-150 and RAM owners of full size rigs. I’m never off road. Why would I be? My whole family has non construction jobs.

Oh yeah. It’s got FWD. Thats another big thing to point and spit dip at in the truck world. I don’t know about you but my old s-10 with that great 4.3 v6 was a nightmare in rain or snow with an empty bed. Any other truck is as well and they even load them up today with traction control to fix it. Gee, I guess Honda thought of something else to fix that but holy shit that made it communist and un-truckerican.

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The el-Camino. An Awesome car based truck that was called a Coupe’ Utility segment. Just like a Chevelle or Impala or any other muscle car of the day that served as that foundation, the Ridgeline is exactly that vehicle of modern times today. How? The Impala or any family car that served as the base of the old truck cars, today, are v6 comfort rides of utility. Enter the Ridgeline Coupe’ Utility. It hauls boats and snow mobiles and all the shit that you actually haul.

This is the best truck for all of us. Too bad that 99% won’t buy it because of some mentally challenged fantasy world they live in.

Or were too broke.