Steve Ballmer edition.

Worth over 28 billion dollars, Steve is the 22nd richest person on our earth, and the 2nd richest client I’ve worked for. Former Microsoft CEO, current NBA Clippers owner, little League assistant coach, and noted philanthropist, he’s also a pretty down to earth dude.

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This is no “Fancy Kristin”. He’s not having wagyu steak and thousand dollar bottles of champagne for dinner every night. Steve Ballmer is just a normal guy, who happens to be very wealthy. The kind of guy you’d see at your average sports bar cheering for his team while knocking back a few cold ones. He’s a family guy who lives with one foot in Seattle, one foot in Las Angeles. His children, instead of being on the news for crashing Lamborghinis, being caught with coke, getting disowned, etc., are in college working on furthering their own careers.

He lives in Washington state—Hunt’s Point—in a well kept up but surprisingly modest home. You won’t find any helicopters or gold plated Bentley’s here. Hell, the family room still has an old television that looks like it belongs on the set of That 70's Show.

Now I know what you’re thinking. There’s got to be SOMETHING that displays all his wealth! Closet full of custom Italian suits? Sports memorabilia worth millions? Garage full of prototype supercars?

No, not really, and definitely not.

I saw a lot of Nordstrom’s house brand shirts which—while perfectly serviceable—are in no way fancy. Hell, my single Ledbury shirt I bought for a wedding is about three times the price, and still costs less than one custom shirt. Priceless sports memorabilia? I suppose it’s possible, if his kids ever go pro. Garage full of supercars? There... Actually isn’t a garage on the property. Just a tiny little carport under the house that’s used for storage. Steve and his wife both drive... Mustache era Lincolns. Yuck. I asked his wife about their car choices and she replied, “the dealership experience is good, they’ve both been bulletproof and they handle long drives pretty well”. Huh.

Steve’s car.

Onto the house! I call this the French pane training ground. Two inexperienced guys take about 9 hours to clean the windows in and out. Two experienced guys can get it in about 4 hours. Homes like this, that are 100% French panes have a huge variance in time to completion because just a slight change in technique can vastly effect efficiency for the better or worse.

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Two stories on 3 sides, three stories on the side with the submerged carport. The top level windows are for the attic. The roof is old thatch, but not falling apart.

First time here, a crew was cleaning the roof off, one of the guys slipped, landed on cement two stories below and died instantly. He was wearing normal tennis shoes and was later found to have been drinking on the job. So just a quick reminder to wear Tiger paws (basically little spikes that strap on around your shoes) or similar whenever on a wooden roof, and save the drinks for after work.

Dude fell off right here. I see it happen again every time I’m up here.

Okay, I guess there’s one thing in the house you don’t see too frequently...