ATTENTION ASSORTED SPARE IKEA FASTENERS AND ARMCHAIR CAR EXPERTS:

Advertisement

Do you want to make fancy-ass posts on Oppo? Can you fog a mirror? If you think you’ve got what it takes (and some commenting history) comment on this post and offer pre-WWII race cars as tribute and I’ll add you as an author between my general lack of enthusiasm for work and fiery Taco Bell poops. And believe me, they are quite fiery. Remember that one Simpsons scene where Hank Scorpio is setting things ablaze with a flamethrower? That, but my ass.

ETA: If you currently have authorship you need not apply; I already know you can fog a mirror.

Advertisement

Here’s the handbook, because all of you are terrible. Read it. Embrace it. Love it.