Most likely not a single opponaut remembers my post a few weeks ago about my trusty Saturn being, in actuality, a RUSTY Saturn, and that my roommate and I were replacing it with, of all things, a bright orange 125cc scooter. After a few delays, and much debate over whether this was a purely emotional terrible decision in the long run, or if it was in fact, an economical, practical,fun choice, we took delivery of Lola, a 2017 Genuine Scooter Company Buddy Kick in “Steal Me”orange (technically just “tangerine”, but they didn’t consult me for the name).

That’s a picture of me pulling up outside our house for the first time, wearing the extremely safe riding gear (please skip the safety lecture, let my stupid decisions be entirely mine) known as “a suit and tie and dress shoes, but at least I have a full face helmet”.

After a few mishaps with a busybody neighbor warrantlessly complaining about out parking situation (how can it be a fire hazard to block an 18 inch wide alley that’s already permanently chained shut???), we finally got an anchor lock installed INTO the concrete sidewalk ($200 bucks, a sunburn, and this sweet picture of the practical combination of scooters and bungee cords).

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(That’s a rented hammer drill, btw, so it’s probably the most manly picture you’ll ever see of a tiny scoot). All in all, the first fill up sucked down a WHOPPING 4012 milliliters (jk, 1.06 gallons) of sweet, sweet 93 octane (requires 91, it’s a spicy little thing), and the odometer read 66 miles. Not exactly the nebulous “100+” that the EPA lets them put on their website and marketing material, but considering our newness to riding, the city streets, the EFI system still correcting air/fuel ratios (stft, ltft), the fatassitude and heavy handedness of (one of) its riders, but it’s about 60, which is still pretty dang good. The second tank is about halfway down with around 45 miles so far, so it’s looking like 80 this time around. It’s also 80 times more fun than a Prius, and we can park it 6 inches from our front door.

Here’s a bonus picture of some dickweasel who parked me in (I had to pay that meter, I could barely fit out when I left, and he got to sit there and use my paid parking time, there were plenty of other spots open before you say “durr u block whole spot 4 tiny scootrr”, plus there’s no parking suitable for tiny vehicles only, and this is Philly, you WILL GET TICKETED/TOWED) Not sure how that enormous scratch got into the front bumper of the van.....

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Questions you probably weren’t going to ask!!

How fast will it go?

So far I’ve barely bumped 50 indicated, but if I wrench all 11 horses to their limit, “60+”. Not legal for highway use, at just 125cc, but plenty of people say they’ve jumped onto the freeway for an exit or two at rush hour because ANY vehicle is fast enough to keep up with a traffic jam (The legendary Schuylkill Expressway, known around here as the Sure Kill). I do not intend on doing this.

But what about the girls?

Girls literally point at it from the sidewalk. Or they’re pointing at me. Either way, it’s all smiles, so I don’t really care.

Can you ride two up?

You can! Technically. It has cute little foot-wings that fold out for the passenger. My roomie and I have only our permits, so at this stage, we personally cannot ride 2up, but it can be done. For short distances. Slowly. Remember, 11hp, belt CVT.

How much did it cost?

We paid about 2500 over MSRP (EDIT: 250, not 2500, holy crap) because we added the crash guards and rear basket thing, but we’re financing it (and the helmets, lock, chain, cover, etc) for under 120 a month (all about that 0% financing, rev up those credit scores kiddos). All in all, we’re about 4500 into it, including tax, tags, accessories and riding gear, and the first years insurance. And the $2.82 in gas I put into it. Super affordable split between two people over three years.

I have another question that you didn’t answer, and/or want to criticize your life choices.

1. Good thing there’s a comment section, and 2. Get off the internet, mom.