So my 9-month old had a blowout. Shit happens. What makes this blowout unique is that she began kicking and thrashing while I was changing her. It went in my hair, on my glasses, and in my mouth. She looked like Slumdog Millionaire. I threw her into a bubble bath. While drying her I couldn't help but notice she wasn't clean. Because of poo on towel. So back into the bath with her. Bear in mind she's been up since 5:30, which is almost an hour and a half early, so she's sleepy, cranky, and screaming like she's on fire. I also still have poop on my face. Finally clean and dressed, I jump back into the shower, put on clean clothes, and start laundry. Again, all while the baby is still screaming. There is also a hungry 3-year old begging for waffles and chocolate and milk and red oranges and The Little Mermaid at this point. When I pick up the baby, she poops again.


On the way out, at almost 9 am, walking past my Alfa in the garage, I stumbled slightly while carrying the baby in her car seat and made a 3" gash in the paint on the passenger side door. I swear to St. Jebus, I almost cried. This is one of those days when I should've dropped the kids off at daycare, then blown off work and gone to see a couple of movies.