150+ Miles (Bump and Update for the Workday Crowd)

Of rock, sand, mud, water crossings, jumps, gravel, and wide open throttle... That’s how long Imperator Slowiosa III survived. I also experienced my first real motorcycle crash, too.

ETA about the crash:

I was riding on a forest trail/road somehow consisting of extremely loose sand (or something like it?). It was like riding on ice. However, so long as I kept a slow pace it was okay. Unfortunately, my team didn’t notice my slowing down and they basically kept full speed ahead.

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To catch up (and to ease my nerves) I decided to ride on the sides of the trail, which consisted of dirt and grass that I could get much more speed with. Well, at some point those grassy sides narrowed to just a couple feet wide with the sand to one side and trees to the other. At some point, the grass was no longer level with the sandy center. This wasn’t a problem until I encountered a rocky, rutty portion of the trail where the grass I was riding on had a 10ft drop down into the ruts below. I target fixated and at roughly 15-20mph I rode off the grass and ten feet down into the rocks.

Like with crashing the Ruckus last year I tried to jump away from the scooter as it happened. My hands (wearing cheap $10 gloves) and my left knee took the entirety of the fall. Hands were fine (gloves only got light scratching) but my knee was bleeding. Well, a dress and yoga pants definitely aren’t good riding gear!

The front wheel broke most of the scooter’s fall, with the dashboard taking the rest of the force, breaking the windshield and taking out both mirrors.

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Yes, this does mean Tucker got Gambler round 2!

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I’m pretty sure the scooter isn’t perma dead but I didn’t feel like troubleshooting it. I’m just going to remove the offroad lights and try to sell it for like $50.

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I jumped this Suzuki.

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Got a ride in this turbo flame spitting Miata death kart.

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Jumped this Malibu so hard my passenger possibly broke a bone. Then I finished it off with a watery grave.

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Considering my goals for this Gambler were to make an ADV out of a scooter, jump a vehicle, do a water crossing, and to kill a vehicle, I’d say this was a smashing success.

And in case you ever wondered who would win in a tug of war, a widebody Festiva or a smart? Me!

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More Gambler 500 shenanigans to come!

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