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A Review Of A Car I Drove In A Dream

Illustration for article titled A Review Of A Car I Drove In A Dream
Photo: Hagerty

The idea behind this is patently absurd, but still entertaining.

I dreamed that I was driving a Citroen DS, which is quite a good thing. Given the unusually vivid nature of my dreams, I really got the full experience. I would say on the scale of good dream to nightmare this was solidly in the good dream category. And I didn’t even have to escape a zombie apocalypse and then complete an imaginary video game before like that time I dreamed I could fly!

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The interior, which was all I really saw, was pretty accurate down to the single spoke steering wheel, dash layout, and comfortable colorful seats. I don’t remember actually getting in the DS so I don’t know how this sequence fits in with the other two parts of my dream I forgot.

Illustration for article titled A Review Of A Car I Drove In A Dream
Photo: Internet
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But where it got strange was the shifter. It was some sort of strange semi auto column shifter without a clutch pedal. It had a horizontal display on the dash like an old fashioned automatic to show you what gear you are in except it was a traditional H pattern column shift. I have never actually driven a manual* much less a column shift, but it seemed fairly accurate outside of unusually long throws.

*successfully

First gear was really hard to find since I was just moving it around until the gear indicator registered first. I didn’t exactly know how to drive it or why I was driving it, but I was.

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Imagine a road like this one, Col du Chaussy if you are curious, but way more wooded and with less visibility
Imagine a road like this one, Col du Chaussy if you are curious, but way more wooded and with less visibility
Photo: Internet

And what’s more, I was driving it up a very very steep, windy, and narrow road with zero sightlines to the next corner. I felt like I was going too fast, yet I was also moving slowly while I hunted for second gear. It was altogether somewhat frightening how ill prepared I was.

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It was such a technical tight curvy road that I felt like someone who is falling off a bike very slowly as they don’t have enough speed to stop the ever escalating wobbles. In my case, I was just going wider and wider and understeering more and more with each corner but I never quite crashed.

Of course, the DS’s handling was fairly accurate, so it was very light and almost as devoid of feedback as the hydropneumatic suspension was from road feel. I could make the corners easily but they came so fast it was hard to react in time. It left me very impressed with how my brain perceives the handling of a Citroen DS but as for how accurate that is, I cannot say.

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And I was also following a generic beige sedan up the hill that was slowly losing me. No idea how, but I couldn’t keep up yet felt uncomfortable at my own speed despite not pushing the limits of the car. It might have been an old Mazda6, but whatever it was it was seriously hauling. I didn’t feel any obligation to pursue it; the car somehow it just made more less at ease trundling along in first yet I never did manage to get it in second.

I woke up supremely impressed with how much my brain had done its homework, but I also came away with an intense desire to drive a Citroen DS in less terrifying circumstances. It was just a nimble yet comfortable cloud that darted around corners with ease, seeming to respond to my inputs almost telepathically. I even managed to sneak a look over my shoulder and there was excellent visibility out the rear. I honestly couldn’t be more enamored with this fictional construct of my dream. Dang, I just really like the DS.

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Have you ever driven a car in a dream? It almost invariably takes the form of a parking brake not quite holding the car in my case (weird considering it is always an auto), so this joyride was a welcome respite.

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