Perusing my local news this morning, I saw a story about yet another attempted car theft thwarted by a stick shift car that the would-be thieves weren’t able to drive. Then I remembered there was just an FP post about a similar event. I decided to check and see if this was, in fact, the same event.

It wasn’t, because the FP post was in Nashville, not Maryland. Turns out, this one happened at the Montgomery Mall, right near me! This picture of a shoe was taken by me, IN MY STICK SHIFT CAR, IN THE MONTGOMERY MALL PARKING LOT.

I like sneakers. This sneaker is the Nike Air Max 270. Interstate 270 is the main highway running from the northwest of the DC beltway, up through Montgomery County, Maryland. Therefore, a couple months ago when I bought this pair of Air Max 270s, I deemed the Nike Air Max 270 the official sneaker of Montgomery County residents. I bought the Nike Air Max 270 at Montgomery Mall, which is right next to Interstate 270. SYNERGY.

Looks like we’re never going to take my wife’s car to the mall since if someone tries to jack me, my stick shift will save the day.

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Not that we go to the mall a lot, of course. But I actually have been there one other time since buying those shoes, which was when my sister-in-law and her husband visited us over a long weekend, and we wanted to kill some time while it was raining. On that visit, I learned that mac ‘n cheese and microwave-in-a-cup muffins are now health food.