Something nice for your time, a ‘73 3.0CS that we’ve worked on for 30 years.

Now to today’s episode:

Car: 2005 530i, 86,000 miles, only seen it one time, last month, for a CEL/bad PCV hose. During our routine scan, a “Gear Monitoring” fault was found in the EGS/TCM, indicating a speed discrepancy between input and output speed sensors. This is almost never a fluke code and usually means the transmission is slipping in gear. We noted this at the time, but no further action was taken.

Customer: Yeah, I brought in my car a month ago, and I’m selling it. The guy wants to have it inspected or some shit, but I just did that! It’s golden, right?

Me: Looks like we just replaced a single PCV hose, there’s a note here about possible transmission issues, we recommended diagnostics and a fluid sample. We didn’t do a vehicle evaluation.


Customer: Is that on the copy?

Me: Yes.

Customer: Can you take it off for me?

Me: No.

Customer: You can’t just, like, take it off?

Me: No, that would be dishonest.

Customer: If the guy calls, can you just not tell him about it?

Me: No, I’m not going to misrepresent anything.

Customer: Ok, ok, can you just, like, tell him it’s nothing he has to do, like right now?


Me: No, look, it had a code stored that I have to document, it’s shifting ok but that code in particular usually means the transmission is slipping in gear, that’s an expensive problem, not something I’m going to hide.

Customer: (various pouting), ok thanks, bye.

Why do people think shit like this is ok? I can’t count how many times people have asked me to lie about their car’s health for sale. Why the hell would I do that?