If your Ford had a Matthew McConaughey, it would be a Lincoln

An instruction manual

Tire has slow leak that worsens in cold weather:

Step 1. Take half day off to fix before holidays.

Step 2. Call Les Schwab ahead of time to see if they have replacement tires if leak can’t be fixed.

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Step 3. They do. Get there right when they open. No line!

Step 4. Vehicle remote battery goes dead on attendant in parking lot. Car won’t start (keyless ignition), so attendant can’t move the vehicle. Alarm keeps going off with attendants shaking their heads.

Step 5. Call partner to wake up and Uber to Les Schwab to get other remote.

Step 6. Les Schwab parking lot slowly fills with other customers who are getting snow tires (etc), and are all now in line in front of you.

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Step 7. Scream internally as you wait.

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