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ATTENTION ALL OPPOS! (Especially YOU, Jason Torchinksy!) A monumental time is upon us!

The first reviews of the belated Jaguar XE are finally arriving. That means Jalopnik will soon have its turn at what is perhaps the most anticipated four-door sedan in Jaguar’s entire history.

HOWEVER, one must remember the, uh, “interesting” XE launch event hosted about a year ago. And how Jason said that he’ll knock off 10 points from the review every time he’s had to relive that memory. It’s right there, in plain language, at the very bottom of the launch report. And it just so happens that I’ve already taken the courtesy of incessantly reminding Jason on a daily basis until the review score should’ve been dropped all the way down to zero.

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So I now eagerly await a Jalopnik first - the first review to score a perfect zero, even before the review car ever arrives on our shores.

You’re welcome, Torch!

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