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FOR SALE: 2001 HYUNDAI ACCENT GS, $500
For your consideration, I am selling my 2001 Hyundai Accent GS 2-door hatchback with 195xxx miles. In recent years, Hyundai made great strides in the quality of their vehicles, but this car was built before they decided to make quality a priority. Regardless, this little survivor has persevered over the last 16 years and against all odds it is still running. It likes for you to hum the theme from “Rocky” when you crank it over. It recently surprised myself - as well as the state of California - by passing its smog test on October 4th, 2016. Was it the “Retro Red” paint job that inspired it to run clean enough to pass? We will never know. What we do know is that this sleeper had ONE HUNDRED AND FIVE tire-shredding, pavement rippling horsepower when it left the factory, and it might still have as much as 10 of those horses currently under the hood. Even the most jaded hot-rodder will slowly let out a low whistle when you open the hood and they get a glimpse of the oil-leaking 1.6 liter 4 banger... that is nearly 98 cubic inches of South Korea’s best internal combustion muscle designed during Y2K. It puts a theoretical 106 lb-ft of torque through a four speed automatic transmission that was replaced (along with a torque converter) at 141,000 miles back in December of 2011. The timing belt was replaced in September 2012. The tires are round. The battery was replaced on September 12, 2016 and has a 24 month warranty. Front brake pads were replaced in May 2017. It WILL need more work.
Now, I’m sure you are asking yourself, “Wow, what’s the catch?” Well, for one, it is a 2001 Hyundai with 195xxx miles. Two, it has an oil leak somewhere on the engine. Check the oil often or fix it - your choice. What is it? I don’t know. Where is it? I don’t know. What will it cost to fix? I don’t know. Three, it has an exhaust leak. I know as much about it as I do the oil leak. Four, it has a habit of eating up front brake pads. Apparently the calipers need to be replaced, or you can just put brake pads on every so often - your choice. Five, the heat and A/C usually work, but the car almost always requires a swift kick in just the right spot for it to turn on. I will provide official Hyundai Climate Control Kick Training at no extra charge. Six, it is a SIXTEEN YEAR OLD HYUNDAI. Don’t let the Retro Red paint fool you, this ain’t no Ferrari. The interior looks exactly like what you would think a sixteen year old Hyundai interior would look like... ditto on the exterior. I don’t wax this thing every weekend, if you know what I mean. You get what you pay for, which leads to the next item...
For this surviving example of Turn-of-the-Century Korean engineering & manufacturing, I am asking the princely sum of $500 USD. That is Five Hundred Dollars. Cash. No checks. No Paypal. No plastic cards. Cash. Don’t have $500 in cash? How much do you have? How much can you borrow? Make me an honest offer, I might accept it. Just make sure it is legal US tender... $500 in ones? Sure! Fifty $10 bills? Great! Five of those pesky $100 bills? Why not? I would prefer you paid with cash that folds - not with cash that jingles - but I won’t go as far as to rule quarters out, either. Just be prepared to sit for a while and watch me count them out. You say you only have $496.25 in quarters? Hey, let’s make a deal! Cash, cash, cash. I don’t care if you are a Nigerian Prince, as long as you bring US cash.
If you are interested in an old, cheap car that needs work - and you have a reasonable amount of cash - please call. Thank you for your time and consideration.