Eastern Grey Kangaroo...like the one I had to finish off
Photo: David Kleinert Photography

I don’t know who you are or were, what the circumstances were, what your excuse was or what ever you were thinking...

But thankyou very fucking much. As a result of your fear, laziness, annoyance or just couldn’t give a fuckance...I had to clean up your mess.

You know that kangaroo that you struck out there on the Purlie Road at some stage this morning...I’m sure it was annoying and all but it’s not like it damaged your vehicle since there weren’t bits of it lying around. Anyway, that one.

Well you didn’t kill it. All you managed to do was break both its legs and leave it lying in the table drain. For hours...

We spotted it this afternoon and went back for it. I had to catch it, hold it down and beat it to death with a wheel brace that wasn’t exactly fit for purpose. How much fun do you think that was?

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As for everyone else that drove past it during the day...none of you are very much better.

If you are involved in an animal strike then make every effort possible to ensure the animal involved is either deceased, finished off humanely or placed into appreciate care. I don’t care how unpleasant or inconvenient you find that experience...just get it done.

Otherwise, you are no better in my mind than a terrorist or pond scum.