So, I ordered something from the UK, like you do, and it was sent DHL. When it arrived on these shores, DHL suggested I authorize drop-off/releasing it from signature-required. “No dice”, thought I - given that the illustrious USPS has occasionally put packages on our neighbors’ porch or elsewhere, and FedEx once used auto-complete on the GPS to be in a whole other neighborhood.
So, it was to arrive today, but yesterday, I received a note via text message that it was out for delivery. Groovy. I warned the old man to watch for DHL deliveries. Several hours later, I get a text saying that my address “appears to be incorrect” and that I needed to update it.
I go into the system, and address appears to be correct. No surprise, because it was CORRECT ENOUGH TO “ATTEMPT DELIVERY” IN MY TOWN, YOU ASSHOLES. I click to confirm. “No information has been changed”. O RLY. Won’t update.
I call in to the phone system. “we are experiencing high call volume” - ok. I stumble around to “delivery notice” and enter my tracking number, and the phone system DISCONNECTS. Well, that was fun. I go back in, the system tells me that there was nobody available to sign for the package, and they’ll try again tomorrow - PLEASE CONFIRM IF THIS IS OKAY OR SELECT A DIFFERENT DATE. I hang up, because no option is offered for talking to a human, and I’m still reeling from the fact the two systems are calling each other liars.
After that, I call back in and try to force my way through to a human operator by just waiting on the line. I get through to ringing - rings off the wall, doesn’t get picked up by a hold system (!), and disconnects. At least three times, over the span of hours. FUN.
So, I wake up this morning to an email from the shipper in the UK. DHL has had the *balls* to email them, saying “do you have another phone number for your boy? His number doesn’t seem to work.”
Apparently, failing to respond (?) to use of my number by navigating their byzantine order handling online counts as my number not working. Not, oh, I don’t know, CALLING THE NUMBER. So now the wacky hijinx of the local courier in not finding the address properly (?) not doing due diligence and entering that into a system poorly equipped to handle it (?); those hijinx have caused Official Lies to be sent to harass people in other countries.
So, finally, I called DHL again this morning, and finally got through. Confirmed that yes, my number was correct, yes, my address was correct, and she *may* have been able to get a note out to the courier office in time so they can attempt delivery today - and if issues arise to just CALL ME ON THE DAMN PHONE.
Sweet fuck, what an ordeal.
P.S: DHL contact this morning asked me why I didn’t just use the live chat on the website. Because I guess I was supposed to guess that works better than their phone system, their couriers, and their online “address fix” system.
P.P.S. Faced with “the courier is an incompetent mook”, you’d think “have it delivered to a locker and pick it up” would be an option. However, nearest DHL locker is something like an hour and a half away. No me gusta.