Hanging out with Zeph last night and the Park Avenue Ultra we were driving around in had some issues. Namely: Park would only engage some of the time, there was an odd noise coming from the trans, and it would occasionally shift REALLY hard without setting a P1411. After driving it for a while it also started not shifting out of first until 4000rpm. After putting the V12 S600 back together and freeing up the lift we got the PAU on it and lifted it up, popped the ball joint, and pulled out the diff. This is what we saw. The diff somehow had walked outboard towards the outside of the car, letting the parking pawl slip between the gear it engages on and the diff leading to it not always locking up. The pawl chipped away most of the corners of the teeth it engages on, and that slurry had found its way between the pawl gear and the transmission case (I really don’t know the technical terms for this shit) and became a lathe removing an enormous chunk of material from that gear. We then dropped the pan and found a pile of metal about two inches in diameter and an inch high which contained the remains of the diff gears and pawl gear, then pulled the filter which was so clogged with metal bits that it was actually fairly heavy.

This car was drivable before we put it on the lift.

How the hell.

It got even more fun when we noticed that the starter motor mount was totally broken, and after engaging and starting the engine the starter would swing down (!!) and slam into the trans coolant lines, one of which was completely pinched off, both of which needed to be replaced along with the starter.

We’re going to clean it out, toss in a new filter and fluid and a new diff, ghetto the parking pawl, and call it a day cuz we’re fairly certain this car is haunted.