Drivers Ed: One of the most bittersweet moments of a teen's life. On one hand, you get to drive,a lot, and not pay for gas or insurance. On the other, you have to follow strict times, drive boring cars, and follow a lot of rules that most drivers don't (such as hands at 10 and 2, hand over hand steering, no radio, no A/C, etc). I signed up and got the handbook in my email today and the introduction is very depressing.

Advertisement

So, I was reading through the book and came across page 5. It was the most depressing thing I have ever read. Here's what it says, word for word (just couldn't copy it):

  • 1. Walk or ride a bicycle whenever you can. Leave the vehicle parked.
  • 2. Plan your day. When you drive, make only necessary trips and plan them to avoid extra miles.
  • 3. Carpool as much as possible
  • 4. Purchase only vehicles that conserve gasoline. These are ordinarily smaller vehicles with smaller engines. Think about why you drive the vehicle you do. Leave the TANKS for the military.
  • 5. Keep your vehicle in good working condition. A well-maintained engine works much more efficiently.
  • 6. Keep your tires properly inflated and eliminate as much wind drag from the vehicle as possible.
  • 7. Be the first one on your block to purchase an electric car, a gas/electric hybrid or some other vehicle that takes advantage of alternative fuels.
  • 8. The days of driving for sheer pleasure are nonexistent. When you drive, have a purpose.
  • 9. Support experimentation concerning alternative fuels for vehicles.
  • 10. Support local and federal legislation that funds organizations that look for alternative fuels.
  • 11. Support legislation that helps eliminate pollution from engines and vehicles.
  • 12. Support legislation that mandates trucks and other like vehicles meet the same emission standards that automoviles do. Manufacturers of semi-trucks currently do not have to meet any government standards.

Now, some of these points are reasonable. But other ones? Look at 4. Who likes to drive a Scion IQ when they have the option to drive a Lamborghini or Spyker, or a big truck if you are into those?

Number 7 is also sad. They think we are all rich and can afford these nice new hybrid cars that have no fun to them. You know how dorky you look riding into the school parking lot in a beige Prius?

Advertisement

Number 8 kills me. No driving for sheer pleasure? Nothing seems more relaxing to me then taking a ride with the top down on a cool evening when the roads are empty and the radio is off. You shouldn't always need a purpose to relax.

9-12 is also sad. Do you really want to support these groups that want to take away your Ferrari and make you drive a Honda Insight? Do you want to have to plug your car in every night?

Advertisement

I don't know if I can take a course about driving that is taught by someone with no passion for driving.

What is your take fellow Jalops?