Warning: Not car related. Swagger wagon buffer image below for those not interested.

It’s sleepy time for everyone but me, so I thought I’d write this to give anyone that was interested an update...

I have been busy. Between work, preparation, and the impending baby, life has kept me from being around much. It has been a big change and the big day finally arrived yesterday.

My wife has been miserable for a number of weeks now. We’ve barely been able to sleep. It has been terrible. I was a total zombie at work for the last couple weeks.

On Friday at 03:45, my wife got up and sloshed. Her water had broken and it was time to get ready to go. The plan was a natural delivery with an epidural because my wife can’t handle pain very well. It went pretty sideways from well before we made it to the hospital and just kept going downhill.


First of all, baby was not at all active or responsive to us the night before and that morning after the water broke. Didn’t realize why until later.

We arrived at the hospital a little over an hour later as they triaged us, baby had a slow heart rate when they got her hooked up, then sped up to a stationary normal level with none of the typical accelerations. This is a baby that was known for really strong activity from twice a week tests over the prior 8 weeks, so it was that much more troubling.

They admitted us as they weren’t going to let us leave unless things looked good for long enough and the water had broken. They were pretty sure the water hadn’t broken, but the lack of changes in heart rate worried them. We rolled my wife to the room and baby’s heart rate remained stable, but with no accelerations.


Baby stayed at that higher normal heart rate for a couple hours, then started dropping in rate every time a contraction came. They decided to get an epidural in at the first opportunity and would wait to use it until pain became severe enough.

They use a scalp monitor after they realized the water had broken and it looked worse than the earlier monitors were showing...

As they installed the epidural, every contraction brought baby’s rate down. The epidural took a long time to place, too. Immediately after that, my wife went to the bathroom and baby’s heart rate dropped to the 60s. The nurse questioned the sensor placement and we couldn’t tell if a contraction was ongoing, but it was low enough to deeply worry the nurse. I open the bathroom door and ask if she’s in a contraction, she says that she is and then that it stopped. The rate doesn’t rise at all (it was doing this before she went to the bathroom, but nowhere near as bad) and about a minute or two after it started, the nurse hits some kind of emergency button. Sirens go off and everyone drops everything on our wing to rush into the room as my wife is trying to get back to the bed. They try on her back to hopefully fix it, but nothing. Then they tried the right side, then the left. No acceleration. They get her up on her hands and knees, which doesn’t help, so they rush a gurney in and move her to it. As everyone is rushing around with paperwork the heart rate finally goes up to the normal range and they stop the emergency C section they were starting.


My wife breaks down crying. I was crying in the moment before that because I was worried someone might not make it (birth is always a risky thing).

We discuss it with the doctor and look at the history, deciding that it’s in baby’s best interest to do a voluntary C section instead of an emergency one, since it would be riskier to do an emergency one and baby might not survive labor if this pattern kept up.

All went well from there and we now have a ridiculously strong newborn baby boy named Callum. He does things I didn’t think newborn babies could do, like roll, lift his head, turn his head, lift his body on hands and knees, pull his arms out of even the tightest of swaddles, etc.



My wife is feeling better and hasn’t needed any additional pain medication since the procedure, which is surprising everyone. If it continues to go as well as it has been, I guess that tomorrow I’ll learn how to put him in a car seat for the ride home. I wanted to take him home in the FoST, but the car seat is a tight fit and my wife doesn’t want to sit in the back, so we had to bring her car. Kind of sad, as I wanted his ride home to be slightly special like mine was, but it was a different era and I don’t think they’ll let you take a baby home without a modern car seat, let alone in a car with no seatbelts today...

I hope to one day be as awesome as Tristan and bring baby on cruises with you guys.