The R went in for service on Thursday for:
1. Tail Light Out (I could fix it myself but I was too lazy)
2. Automatic Window Recalibration (I don't have the software)
3. "Active Chassis Settings Service Required Light"
The dealer was super-busy and they weren't able to run diagnostics by today, so I rescheduled the chassis part of the service.
The rest was completed for a total of $0.00. The dealer felt bad that it took so damn long that they didn't have the heart to charge me for a thing, including 4.5 days in two Toyota Loaners (Sienna, which I returned and got a Corolla).
Glad to be back in a legitimate car, not an appliance. Just pissed they washed my car (I specifically ask for them not to, because I have a fear of machine washes).