How do I avoid writing about my own truck here?

1999. I was 4 and the Vulcan motor was... how old again? That's what's powering this mighty beast. It seems like it's not too happy about it either, it's throwing a CEL and even has the occasional temper tantrum where it barely wants to run. The gear indicator doesn't match up. Pretty sure that's a Ford thing across the line. 110K miles! Wow! Annnnd... it's starting to rust. Also, a Ford thing across the line. It's got the 90's tastic wheels with all the slots and holes. They're hard to describe. With matching cheesy hubcaps! FOUR BY FOUR. FOUR LOW AND GO. Although to be honest I don't know if it works, I didn't try. I don't know what good it would do with nearly dead tires. Hauls scrap nicely, though.

I shouldn't do Rangers on First Gear. I just end up wanting to compare them to my own.

First Gear is a new column, about a kid, a car lot full of new cars, and a habit of noticing random things. It's written from the view of a Ford dealer's lot attendent who for some reason thinks you care about the cars he spends very little time in. He also thinks you actually care about his random thoughts and will randomly post them to Oppositelock at his leisure. Just don't give him an excuse to break into full reviews. He can't handle that level of greatness.