Flathead County Police Blotter

7:45 a.m. A Whitefish man reported an unexpectedly large amount of bacon in his breakfast burrito. <-I made that one up.

2:22 a.m. A man refused to leave the bar after closing time.

8:15 a.m. A Kalispell man said three chainsaws and a cooler were stolen from his truck.

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9:02 a.m. A bald man was causing trouble at a local store.

9:51 a.m. Some Kalispell neighbors were being loud.

2:13 p.m. Someone broke into a home in Kalispell.

2:30 p.m. Some youths were driving like jerks down the bypass.

2:58 p.m. Those pesky youths apparently drove to an area parking lot and met up with some of their pesky youth friends.

3:18 p.m. A group of people were trespassing and screaming.

3:26 p.m. A Kalispell man said he discovered a woman slumped over the wheel in her car. The man thought she might be on drugs. Upon further investigation he saw that the woman was breathing and might just be taking a nap. He decided to let her continue her nap.

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3:39 p.m. A dog was in distress.

4:02 p.m. A bike was stolen.

5:02 p.m. A shoplifter was caught.

5:08 p.m. Someone at a local bar thought he would call 911 for fun.

7:24 p.m. A man got into a physical altercation with an ATM after it took and kept his debit card.

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7:33 p.m. A Kalispell woman called the cops on her two sons. Apparently, they have been fighting for days and she “just can’t deal with it anymore.”

8:34 p.m. Two drunk teens, a male and a female, were stumbling through Kalispell with a dog.

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9:10 p.m. A child playing with a phone thought it would be fun to play everyone’s favorite game of call 911.

10:10 p.m. Someone saw two teens and thought they were up to no good. Turns out they were just fixing their skateboards.

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10:15 p.m. A Kalispell resident called to report that there was someone lying in the middle of the road. Turns out they were just stargazing. The person was advised to stay out of the way of traffic.

10:18 p.m. A Kalispell man said his phone was “blowing up” because of some false rumors being spread about him.

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11:17 p.m. Someone reported that there were people “spinning donuts” in an area parking lot. A Kalispell police officer went over to talk to the donut spinners who reported that they were filming a movie. The officer told dispatch that it “seemed legit” and went about his other duties.

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