Following up this post, the blown engine is finally out of the car and I have photos of the carnage that ensued when the engine let go. It looks like the bearings on the #3 connecting rod decided they didn’t want to be bearings anymore and made a break for it, causing my engine to spontaneously sprout a primary inspection window on the left side of the block and a secondary inspection window in the oil pan. The force was so great that the arm that bolts to the side of the block which attaches the engine mount was blown straight off the engine. You can see the bolt holes where it should be mounted just to the left and right of the hole in the block, they are the clean ones. Apparently the only thing holding the engine in the car was the right-hand engine mount and the front subframe.
Warning, Gratuitous engine carnage pictures follow. If you are disturbed by severe mechanical carnage, please turn away now
Buffer picture of my overly adorable Cat
Now that we are down here...Here is the carnage
This is my engines new inspection port. You can see all they way down to the giant hole that was also blown in my oil pan.
Connecting rods aren’t suppoused to look like that...
and the bottom half of the connecting rod is most assuredly not suppoused to look like this
It blew out the production info and the BMW logo all in one piece.
The mechanic said he also saw a chunk of the piston in the oil pan that he’s going to try to fish out on monday. He’s going to run all the pieces through the parts cleaner for me so I can build a shadowbox in memorial of the old engine.