How do I save a special car from an evil, neglectful owner?

So Jalopnik... I live in the Midwestern US, and there's a car that I drive by almost every day. It's a late 1980s Buick Grand National. The interior (as of 8 months ago) appeared to be in nearly flawless shape. The harsh oscillation of weather (record triple digit summers with single digit winters) is slowly destroying this beautiful car. It has sat, unmoved for at least 2 years. I've knocked on the door of the house, trying to ask about purchasing the car or even offering to secure it with a tarp. The guy told me that it was his neighbors, but I suspect he was trying to throw me off his trail. Either way, a white van parks next to the Buick every night, so I know someone is walking by it every day.

I know this is an age-old problem... You see a rare, incredible car slowly withering away before your eyes... Well, I'm leaving the country in just over a week and before I leave I want to either;

A: Leave a long, detailed note. Attempt to get into his psyche and shame him into action by asking how he sleeps at night. Perhaps take a few cheap shots. I'm merely attempting to briefly understand what kind of person lets a beautiful Grand National rot in their front yard, no easy task.


B: Post a craigslist ad where I sarcastically pretend to be the owner. "I have a great 1987 Buick Grand National....not for sale. I'm instead going to be a selfish asshole and let my car rot under the elements."

C: Stick FOR SALE signs on the car. I'm getting desperate.

I realize neither of these are very effective strategies. But I feel powerless to save this car. And not very many of my friends care about cars, especially old Buicks from the 1980s :( So, give me ideas.

Illustration for article titled How do I save a special car from an evil, neglectful owner?

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