If your Ford had a Matthew McConaughey, it would be a Lincoln

I Acquired A Thing

This actually happened in the summer, but somehow I never posted about it. My nonagenarian grandfather suffered a stroke last winter and, among other consequences, had to give up driving. He eventually gave his car to RPM Junior.

Say hello to the one-elderly-owner, dealer-maintained, low-mileage, base-model, garage-parked, California-owned 2004 Subaru Forester of your most boring dreams. It was driven first by my grandmother, but not for long before she had a stroke and couldn’t drive anymore, and then by my grandfather after he finally gave away his ancient, rusty Toyota pickup. It had probably never exceeded 60 miles per hour before my kid got his hands on it.


To put it gently, my grandfather probably should have stopped driving a few years ago, just due to having old eyes, old reflexes, and old/immobile neck muscles. Up until the stroke, he was about as healthy as you can be in your 90s, but still... My mom and her siblings were working on the issue, but he is a very stubborn old man. Keeping the car in the family really softened the blow, and he was open to the idea even before the stroke forced the issue. He has also lived in a retirement community with a parking garage full of other old people for several years, so combined with his own driving there is not an unblemished panel on it, although the paint cleans up great where it hasn’t been dented or scratched. Only one panel was really bad, so we replaced that, and took care of some other relatively minor things—two wheel bearings, a couple leaks, most of the wear items. Junior and I installed a more modern head unit for his tuneage needs before he and his mom drove it back from California. It suits his needs perfectly.

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