I posted another edition of Tales of an Auto Enthusiast this morning, and it was promoted by Matt only a few minutes after. I only went on Jalopnik a few minutes ago, and I was super stoked to see my piece on Jalopnik, but as soon as I scrolled down to the comments, all I saw was hate, some more hate, and some dickishness thrown in for good measure.

This brings me to my point: what I love about Oppositelock is the camaraderie among everyone, whereas Jalopnik is usually full of assholes and haters. Just look at the comments on Jalopnik articles, then go to Oppositelock and it’s full of reasonable debates, and admiration for each other.

The basis for the all the hate was the fact that I have an AMG banner decal on the windshield of my non AMG car, and there is also an AMG emblem on the grille. There was also hate directed at the Ring stickers on the side windows, and one or two on the red brake calipers. There were few, if any, comments on the actual piece and my writing, which doesn’t surprise me since it was featured on Jalopnik. I suspect that if it had stayed on Oppo, that there might have been a few comments about the AMG stuff, but most would have been about the actual writing. How do I know that it would have been different on Oppo, well, when I posted my C Class comparison, I featured pretty much the same pictures, and low and behold, there weren’t any dickish comments about my car.


Now, in my defense, I have never advertised my car as being an AMG. I only put the banner and the emblem on the front so you would be able to tell it’s my car from the front. The back window has an “I am the Stig” decal on it. There were two people who had somewhat constructive criticism for the stickers and weren’t total dicks, but I still have issues with their criteria. One was that since it’s not an AMG, I can’t have the decal, and two was that if I haven’t been to the Ring, that I also can’t have the decals.


I’d say those are both incorrect. The car is mine, and I shall do with it what I will. I have not mutilated the car in any way; the car is still stock except for the AMG wheels, so I do not think it makes the car look any worse. I know there are many people who do not like the look of a bunch of stickers, but I happen to like them, at the moment, if only to have my car stand out from the crowd. Granted, it would still do that just by its clean appearance, and the red motif I have going with the brakes and the lug nut caps.

But even if you don’t like the look of the stickers, is it really necessary to shit all over me and my car? I think not. While I don’t like ricer cars, I don’t go up to the owner and talk shit to them about their car and start insulting them personally because that’s just wrong. I worked at Honda for a short while and all the guys there were Honda lovers, but I didn’t think any less of them, I just prefer German cars, does that mean they need to talk shit to me and my car? Again, I don’t think so.


I don’t know, I guess I’m just irritated that assholes rained all over my parade when I saw that my second installment got promoted just like my first one.

Oh and I should clarify some sections in the article, as I sometimes do.

“Gas mileage in my particular car sucks, but it’s really down to the fact that I rev it out pretty much every single time to hear to exhaust, and I the surge in acceleration the car provides owing to the way torque is developed from the supercharger.” What I mean by this is that a lot of time, from a stop, I’ll accelerate and keep going to around 4 or 5,000 RPM just to feel the surge and hear the exhaust, but because my car is not super-fast, I’m not speeding, I just get up to speed much more quickly.


“Some of the best times were when my friend (the 330Ci owner) and I took both of cars out at the same time, which was rare since we usually just took turns driving our cars. We were such a menace, but god it was fun.” We did not go out driving often, and I never endangered anyone, we did not speed too much (I know that sounds stupid since I was still speeding, and just because everyone does it doesn’t make it right), and saying we were a menace was not meant to be literal, but an exaggeration. I need to work on the whole comedic embellishment thing, like the way Doug Demuro writes.

“Then take off at speeds that are much too fast, and listen to the exhaust bounce off everything and set off car alarm.” The street I live on is adjacent to a much busier street with a blind corner to your left, and to your right, so whenever I leave my house and go this way, I always punch it to get out into traffic because people always come around the corner way too fast. When I do this in my Mercedes, because the exhaust has no muffler, it sounds awesome (to me and anyone that appreciates a good exhaust note.) While there is no muffler, because it’s only a four cylinder, it’s actually not much louder than any high end sports car, and my car is quiet compared to an F-Type in Eco mode. Also, I’ve only been able to set off one car alarm that was parked right behind me at school and I had to take off at full throttle to set it off, I can’t drive by cars and rev it to set off alarms.

“Things also tend to fall off the car and break owing to the fact that car was built in the prime of the DaimlerChrysler era.” Things don’t really fall off my car, I was embellishing, and people need to not take things so literally. And that leads me to my last comment: “Reliability is boring.” This is something I say to other German car owners because they find it funny, as do I. I would love it if my car were as reliable as a Toyota, but it’s not true, so there’s no point in getting pissed off if something happens because I expect it to, this is how you enjoy a German car and don’t wallow in self-pity all the time.


What do some of you think on the actual article and your (reasoned) opinions on the decals? I look forward to hearing from the regular Oppo crowd, since you guys are so much more civil. I know now that I’ve essentially given credence to some of the arguments that I should expect more hate, but I’m hoping some of the more reasonable, mature Oppo members will come out and share some of their wisdom.