If your Ford had a Matthew McConaughey, it would be a Lincoln

I blame Audi

Way back in 2004 they started an arms race by sticking a big ugly black grille on a perfectly Bauhaus A6, and now I have to put up with seeing this vomitous monstrosity as I exit my local cafe.

Not the actual offending Alphard, I was too busy puking to take a photo.

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