If your Ford had a Matthew McConaughey, it would be a Lincoln

I don't like people

1) Some guy smacked my car as I drove past him on Saturday night. Why was he walking in the street when there was a perfectly good, clear sidewalk that EVERYONE ELSE was using? Fuck him. I can’t drive on the sidewalk so you shouldn’t walk in the street. I should have run him over.

2) I had a coupon for a gallon of milk for $0.99 that expired today. It was for a reopened convenience store at a gas station. They didn’t have any gallons left. I asked if I could have a rain check. No. I asked if they could extend the date. No. I asked if I could have two half gallons for that price, and the answer was... No. Fuck that. I was planning on picking up a few other items, but to hell with that.

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3) Why must these assholes slow down whilst crossing in a crosswalk? He was walking faster until he got into the crosswalk but then took the speed waaaay down. I could have cut him off and continued on my way but I decided to be nice and let him go first. Just fucking go instead of slowing down to a crawl as I wait for you.

4) Some dumbfuck didn’t want to wait for the light so he made a right turn and immediately crossed a double yellow line, in front of oncoming traffic, to get into the right turn lane on the other side of the street so he could continue without having to wait at the light like the rest of us. I wish he would have gotten hit, but I wouldn’t want someone else to be involved in an accident because of this impatient moron. Why can’t there be a cop when you need one? Usually they’re there at that intersection, sort of; K9 units often let their dogs run in the field by that intersection, but today there wasn’t one there. Damn.

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