Now that I’m home from college, I’ve finally had time to fire up my Xbox and try out the Heists for GTA V. And now I want every Rockstar employee to die in a grease fire.

I’ve been stuck on the Humane Labs Heist for 3 days now. I can’t get past the last setup mission where you have to deliver the Insurgent/EMP to the Merryweather facility. Rockstar literally made it impossible to beat this mission.

First, I spend the better part of an hour dicking around in lobbies, waiting for people to join my heist. Then, we all have to drive across the entire goddam map to pick up the armored Insurgent truck. Then we have to drive as a team to the Merryweather complex. Already that’s 10-15 minutes depending on how incompetent your teammates are at driving to a waypoint.

Then your team needs to SILENTLY kill every Merryweather guard in your way. The only way to do that is for multiple teammates to simultaneously snipe adjacent guards. This can’t be done unless every teammate has a headset and is actively communicating with each other as to which guard they’ll take out.

If anyone misses their shot, you alert the guards, and you fail the mission.

If anyone shoots too early, you alert the guards, and you fail the mission.

If anyone forgets to use a silenced weapon, you alert the guards, and you fail the mission.

Advertisement

Once you fail 3 times in a row, a teammate rage quits, and everyone is kicked back into the lobbies. Then you waste another 40 minutes waiting to try again, only to repeat the process.

Fuck you Rockstar.