Illustration for article titled I HAVE DONE IT.

Perfectly timed. The Lexus GX (an evil, polluting SUV) hit this historical mileage as I pulled it into the garage.

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BEHOLD, I AM AN 11 YEAR OLD MAN WHO GETS HIS JOLLIES BY MAKING HIS WIFE’S LUXURY VEHICLE SHOW STUPID NUMBERS.

Thank you for indulging me.

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