The day I met them, I knew I was going to kill them one day. One day soon. It is a simple fact of life: sometimes you have to kill the ones closest to you. I began plotting their execution almost immediately, scouring the internet for the most effective methods and getting myself prepared mentally. Soon I was buying supplies and printing out plans. They suspected nothing, and my hatred for them only grew.
Despite the internet making killing them look easy, yet it wasn’t as straightforward as I’d thought. I made my first attempt last weekend, but ended up botching the job. Despite all my prep, I just wasn’t as prepared as I’d thought. Unfortunately, now they were on to me, so I had to keep them locked in the garage until I could try again.
Last night I finally succeeded. They were dead. Finally. The nightmare was over.
Cleanup took longer than expected. Their execution was a little more elaborate than it needed to be, so there were tools everywhere that needed cleaned up. Also, the car needed a good wash after all that, so late in the evening I took it to an empty car wash and scrubbed it down.
The only hint that they were once with me is a slightly modified wiring harness....
... and a sticker on the back glass.
How I did it
As I mentioned earlier, turns out my shuttle valves were actually bad, not just the wiring harness. New ones came in yesterday, so I took the evening to finish the install.
The fix is pretty simple. Essentially you bypass a small circuit board in the ABS solenoid thingy (technical term) by re-routing the wiring directly to the wiring harness. Easy enough. With that in it was a simple case of putting the ABS pump back in its bracket, which was the opposite of fun considering how many hard lines got bent pulling it out. Easier than bleeding the brakes, I guess.
Now I have an amigo free dash!
I also got the driver’s side key working and the passenger power lock working.
Unfortunately the passenger door appears to be leaking. I’m guessing I didn’t put the window frame back quite right, so that needs doing...