I like birds, I really do. Even when they crap all over my car, I forgive them. But today I did something that may have killed a few.

When I went to lunch I realized that I forgot to bring my chemotherapy drugs, so I went home for lunch. Everything was OK until I went to leave. I got suddenly and violently ill, and started to throw up. There was some splashing on the front door and entry hall wall, but I managed to get outside before the rest of lunch made a very hasty exit. I stood on the porch, puking my guts out, and then got in the car and went back to work.

I came home and found that most of my ejected lunch had disappeared, and my porch was now covered in bird shit. I guess they decided to feast on it, much in the way mama bird feeds baby bird. In that mess on the porch I remember seeing my chemo pills, intact, as I left for work. However, they weren’t there when I returned and I fear that some of the birds ate them. On the bright side, if any of them had colon cancer they may be cured, but I suspect that 500mg of Xeloda will probably kill them. I know that stuff makes me feel absolutely horrible, so I can’t imagine what it would do to a tiny little bird.

I’m very sorry, my find feathered friends, I really didn’t mean to kill you...