I'm being told to do a speech

A best man speech, to be precise.

I already hate public speaking as-is, now I even have to write it. I came up with a short and concise one, just introduce myself, congratulate them and a toast, then I was told it wasn’t long enough and it has to “heart-felt” and “humourous”.

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Searched online for a few speech outlines and samples, mostly are either padded with stories or words about the bride, whom I don’t even think I met that many times to even form words about. Quite frankly some of the samples make me cringe reading them.

I just want to get this over with and from now on I am banning all best-man duties if this is a requirement...

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