Update: I’m sober now...And the feels are hitting me like a hammer. A part of me just wants to hop on the Buell and ride towards the West Coast until I reach it, it breaks, or I run out of money, which ever happens first.
As much as I try my best not to think about it, I keep coming back to thinking that everything good in life will never last forever. And for some, those good things will be lost sooner than later. I sorta feel this is karma for breaking the hearts of three women that didn’t deserve it before I met him. Agh...I just want to sleep. Maybe seeing my ex as a bestie on Saturday will help me clear those thoughts.
But until then, I’ll occupy my mind with trying to get smart #4 moving. I have until Monday to extricate it from the storage unit.
One day I’ll make these relationship things work. I guess karma did its thing and I’m on the receiving end of the breakup this time. Figured this would happen.
Starman’s reasoning is that I deserve way better than him. He wanted to love me as much as I loved him, but relationships just really aren’t his thing. He loves me but more as a BFF than a lover. If this sounds familiar, don’t worry, it’s nearly exactly the same reasoning I gave the girl I broke up with right before I met him.
It’s not because he doesn’t love me, just he knew he couldn’t give me the sustainable relationship I was looking for. I respect his decision and am happy he didn’t wait too long to do it.
We plan on continuing to be friends, with going boating on Saturday and maybe Pride on Sunday.
In a way, I feel okay. I didn’t feel like I was settling, though I feared that maybe our relationship wouldn’t have been the dream I thought it would be. Looks like I’ll never know.
Either way, I’m too drunk to cry. Cover photo is the last picture I took during our adventures as a couple.
Post motorcycles to cheer me up.