Where the hell has Shannon been? Why is he referring to himself in the third person? WTF is going on here?

Last fall the girlfriend and I began talking about getting our sailing certifications so that we could buy a sailboat and/or charter boats outside the US. And by "talking about" I really mean to say that I told her that boat ownership was the stupidest idea I had ever heard. On a scale of "No" to "No fucking way". I completely skipped considering "No" as an answer.

AKA "Skipper"

So last fall we got a 38ft Sailboat. Note, when you own a boat and you are telling people about it (which you will do all the time, like a Porsche) you must always give the boat length before any other descriptors. It's like meeting someone and instead of shaking hands you just unzip and whip it out for them to consider. Boat people are strange, but that's an entirely different discussion. So that's where I have been, on a boat. Making the awesome financial decisions you have come to expect from me I assure you. Fear not though, the sailing season in the PNW is excruciatingly short and it is time to get back to cars. Just in time for rain to return, oh well.

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S/V Karma Lena

The boat (38ft long in case you were wondering) is moored about an hour and a half north and on occasion I blast the 930 up and back. It's on these drives I have begun to notice just how malevolent this car is. If a collection of steel and glass can possess "ill intent", it's the 930. I turn the ignition key in this car and some ancient reptilian side of my brain perks up and takes over. The more I drive it the worse it has been getting. When you are behind the wheel of a 930 your sanity is simply along for the ride.

I really am a pretty easy going driver outside the Porsche. Get me in that car though and I am….well, to be frank, a jerkoff. You read allot about cars which "ask for it", the 930 skips the formality of asking. You shift out of 4th gear and flat foot it in 3rd because it tells you to. A gentle squeeze of throttle in 4th will put just about anyone behind you at perfectly reasonable rate, but then they wouldn't "know" what an open wastegate sounds like. So you grab 3rd, you blast past Joe Commuter in a cacophony of flat six howl riding a huge wave of boost. Like a jerkoff in a Porsche would. You feel bad having done so but no sooner than it takes to register that thought there is someone else in the left lane who needs to know the length of your boat. On and on this goes. Suddenly you are "the campus streaker".

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I love Will Ferrell.

The 930 is a curious beast in that it covers the mouth of reason and tells you to "trust it", it knows "what's best", "don't worry buddy, I got this". The 930 is that guy who says "hold my beer, watch this". The insane thing is that you totally don't trust it, but still you press it harder and harder. Insanely the more you give it the better it gets. I have never done cocaine but tired as that comparison is I have to think that this is what it must feel like. Next thing you know you are home….the 930 lights a cigarette in the garage and promises next time it will be more behaved. It really is a wonderful thing. I need a radar detector and a good lawyer.

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"Send lawyers, guns and money" — Mr. Zevon

So maintenance wise I have been trying to be frugal. When we last left off the car was in need of spring plate bushings and some suspension attention. Through the local Porsche community I found a mechanic who was willing to do the work for about half the price of the quotes I had gotten. Let it be said this does indeed raise suspicion. I researched him and his shop and felt allot better about it, he is primarily a vintage Ferrari guy and maintains a few vintage 935 race cars. So the car goes in to him tomorrow. We'll see. Its proving difficult to find to strike the right balance of trust/cost in the Porsche service world.

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In keeping with frugality I bought some small items to address some small annoyances. The manual binder which comes stock is cheap plastic and with age it begins to disintegrate. I have been seeing good condition examples begin to go for dumb prices, mine is great condition so to keep it that way I had a leather guy make me up a custom cover so I can put my plastic one into storage.

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I really hope I am not becoming one of "those" people. BMW "blue tool kit cloth" folks I am looking at you.

The next annoyance (and I know how ridiculous this sounds) is that the taillight lens screws were silver. For some reason it makes the rear end look dated to me. The screws themselves have a little rubber washer that goes on the inside of the lens because of the ludicrous "designed to leak water" taillight engineering. Pelican to the rescue and again I get farther away from being carbon neutral.

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"Problem" solved. OCD = Happy.

Then I found someone doing custom embossed horn buttons for Momo wheels.

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It looks allot better in person than it does in pictures but I am sort of tossed up on if I love it.

They can't all be winners I suppose. Speaking of…..

I now have a third set of wheels.

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16x7 and 16x9 factory 930 Fuchs.

Hey, here is a picture of my 38ft sailboat…it's for sale btw. ☺