If your Ford had a Matthew McConaughey, it would be a Lincoln

Its creepy and I hate it

Yes, this is really happening.

I want to share something with you that I hate. Creepy soulless breakfast mascots.

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Why you looking at me with your dead eyes? Why do you ALL have the exact same expression and ALWAYS no mater what you are doing?

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It’s not just these three little psychos...they ALL do this. Copy and paste the same face on the character no matter what they are doing and how they are posing. It’s the same thing all cereal mascots do. Tony the tiger? “Theeeeeir creepy!” Lucky charms? “they’re after me immortal soul!” (ha, just kidding, we all know leprechauns don’t have souls...especially lucky)

It’s because their “identity” only comes with one committee approved expression. It’s the corporate grill of the cereal mascot world.

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Why are they not allowed to feel thing? Am I not supposed to feel things? Just sit and be happy with my Cap’n crunch? MOVE YOUR EYES YOU GOON FACED MARINER! 

Is “Pop” icing out emoticons with his dead eyes symbolic of the veneer of happiness and emotional fulfillment we put on in this age of consumerism and disconnectedness?

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“Eat your damn krispies kid and be happy, nothing is wrong with the world. Pop wants you to be happy!”

These are the important things.

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