Yes, it is time to finally admit it. No matter how much of an enthusiast you are, it is time to admit that cars are mere appliances. They are tools, used by us to accomplish tasks, and nothing more. I know it is difficult to say that, but it is true. So is this it? Is car enthusiasm now dead? What is the point if you are telling me my Scion iQ is no different than my dishwasher?

Well, while trying to make a smoothie in my washing machine, I realized something. Some appliances are not meant to do certain tasks. There is no single appliance that can do everything. My washing machine cannot make a smoothie, my toaster cannot dry my clothes, and my microwave cannot brew my coffee. I need different appliances for these tasks, I cannot merely survive on one.

So if cars are appliances, then I need a variety of machines to do different tasks, right? My Scion iQ is great for getting me to and from work, but it cannot carry more than 2 people. That isn’t good for picking up kids from school or hitting the local town with friends, a small sedan would be great for that.

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But a small sedan cannot carry large furniture, therefore, I need a small pickup truck.

My pickup truck doesn’t perform well on long road trips and my iQ and small sedan are not the best suited, therefore I need a family traveler of some sort that gets decent mileage.

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Some appliances are seasonal, like my snow cone maker. I like to have that in the summer, so as a personal luxury appliance, I’ll get a convertible sports car.

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But if my family wants to go camping and I find that my small pickup truck cannot move the camper, I need a bigger pickup truck

Like my old appliances, my old truck will go into the cupboard to sit for the next 20 years only to be given to my children for their first apartment.

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Many people try to buy cars that can do everything they need. This stigma makes one think that a car is a simple machine that gets from A to B. But if people actually treated cars as appliances, then one car cannot simply complete all of the possible tasks. They need multiple cars to complete different kinds of tasks.

So perhaps, only car enthusiasts should treat cars as appliances?

Happy April Fools!