There’s falling dihydrogen monoxide right now, which I heard is dangerous. So, what better to do than stay inside and talk about the weird features of my new cat.

Although the XJL is a long car, it isn’t particularly tall. The Fiat 500 is more than five feet shorter, but significantly taller and with more ground clearance.
Although the XJL is a long car, it isn’t particularly tall. The Fiat 500 is more than five feet shorter, but significantly taller and with more ground clearance.
Illuminated door sills are no big deal in this segment, but apparently it’s not standard on the XJ. The Illumination Package was originally a $1700 option. It also includes mood lighting on the climate vents, door handles, door bins, etc.
Illuminated door sills are no big deal in this segment, but apparently it’s not standard on the XJ. The Illumination Package was originally a $1700 option. It also includes mood lighting on the climate vents, door handles, door bins, etc.
The reverse camera is awkwardly located down on the lower bumper. This presents two problems: First, the view is far too low to judge walls and bushes—the only things it can portray somewhat accurately are low kerbs.
The reverse camera is awkwardly located down on the lower bumper. This presents two problems: First, the view is far too low to judge walls and bushes—the only things it can portray somewhat accurately are low kerbs.
The second problem is that in cooler temperatures the view is mostly clouded by the car’s own exhaust water vapour. This is actually frustrating enough to be amusing.
The second problem is that in cooler temperatures the view is mostly clouded by the car’s own exhaust water vapour. This is actually frustrating enough to be amusing.

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Many flagship luxury sedans have power rear lids. I’m not sure if this is normal, but Jag’s interior release button only opens. To close, you must press the button on the inner boot lid. Even the exterior release button at the rear serves only to open it.
Many flagship luxury sedans have power rear lids. I’m not sure if this is normal, but Jag’s interior release button only opens. To close, you must press the button on the inner boot lid. Even the exterior release button at the rear serves only to open it.
The dome lights are all touch-sensitive, with no physical button.
The dome lights are all touch-sensitive, with no physical button.

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I thought only the Italians used questionable sticky finishes. Every single button control is finished in gummy plastic that has not aged well through 3 Arizona years. Oddly, the knob surfaces are finished in normal rubber that has not turned sticky.
I thought only the Italians used questionable sticky finishes. Every single button control is finished in gummy plastic that has not aged well through 3 Arizona years. Oddly, the knob surfaces are finished in normal rubber that has not turned sticky.
The front grilles are lined with nice-looking “wire” finish, but upon closer inspection it’s just plasti-chrome. Tapping it with my fingers confirms that I did not buy a Bentley.
The front grilles are lined with nice-looking “wire” finish, but upon closer inspection it’s just plasti-chrome. Tapping it with my fingers confirms that I did not buy a Bentley.

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The most questionable styling cue is the blacked-out C-pillar. The intent was to visually widen the rear window, and with my car’s insanely deep tint it actually works.
The most questionable styling cue is the blacked-out C-pillar. The intent was to visually widen the rear window, and with my car’s insanely deep tint it actually works.