The reason America is so F’d up right now? Client’s Ferrari for your time

We’re stupid. Plain and simple. I have strong political feelings, but this stupidity crosses party lines. What started as a severe lapse in judgment—reading comments on an instagram post with the caption “vaccinations work, the earth isn’t flat, chemtrails aren’t real”—turned into one some of the most depressing hours of my life. Fair warning, this topic depresses me like no other, so as any healthy young adult would do, I turned to alcohol and internet friends (that’s you!). Sorry for typos, rambling, etc.

Let me share some things with you. I fell down the rabbit hole, reading people’s opinions on everything from religion, to politics, to history, to racial tension and beyond.


These are real, actual human beings that are not only 100% alive, but have a say in the way our country is run. I checked profiles to verify that these were indeed real adults. Yep. And that’s a small sample. The number of racist, conspiracy-toting, so-fucking-dumb-It’s-a-miracle-they-can-type-a-semi-coherant-sentance Americans that are perfectly happy to share their stupidity with everyone who will listen... Is painful. Somewhat related, I follow a military humor page, and I had to stop liking the posts because Instagram’s algorithms would then put endless hardcore gun-toting, Bible-pushing conservative posts in my feed, like “if I die, I’m taking the immigrants with me“ or “arm the children and we’ll never hear about school shootings again”.

Now here’s something else for you. Roughly 90% of americans believe in God, according to polls by Gallup and others.

Guess how many believe in evolution?

Guess how many would rank Noah’s Ark as more probable than dinosaurs?

Guess how many believe that the moon landing was real?

Guess how many idiots legitimately believe that the earth. Is flat.

Guess how many believe that cancer is Jesus’s way of saying “I want to meet you in person?” (yes, I read that. This comment had about twenty likes. This is the point where I started drinking).


Here, I’ll answer the first question. It’s split by party, but again, everyone is stupid.

Anyways, I had a point—I think—but now I’m just going to curl up with a nice cold glass of beer, try to forget the last few hours and watch Futurama.