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Let's go down the list, shall we?

Illustration for article titled Lets go down the list, shall we?

To get to this point from 117,000 miles has required:

New inner/outer tie rod ends, front control arms, front ball joints, 24 new spark plugs, 24 new coil boots, 2 A/C recharges, a set of new valve cover gaskets, new front cross drilled and ventilated disks with ceramic pads, and one $5,500 replacement of the tandem ABC/PS pump, one pair of Continental DWS06 tires on the front, and one trip to a wheel shop to make the wheel that blew out a circle again. Also it was totalled by the insurance company in an accident and now has a rebuilt salvage title.


So where does that leave us now?

My blower motor controller is on it’s way out, my interior temp sensors for the climate control probably all need to be replaced anyway along with whatever mechanisms control the direction of air in the dashboard, my 12V outlets have never worked, I need new rear brakes, my massaging seats don’t work, I’ve got a bad inner tie rod again, my rear main seal has degraded to the point it leaves puddles, the coilpacks still misfire on a warm startup sometimes or when I really wind out the engine, nobody has looked at the turbos in a while, my Distronic adaptive cruise is currently completely inoperative, the marker and sidelights still throw fault codes on startup (despite being totally functional) from the collision repair, it’s wearing the wrong grille, the soft-close in the driver’s door has a ruptured diaphragm, and I have a nail in one of the two remaining old Conti DWS tires on the rear.


But hey; driving around like the 3rd world despotic totalitarian autocrat you’ve always fantasized about being?

Priceless, baby. Priceless.


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