Hey Oppo I just really need to talk to someone, and I am not good about doing that in person, so I am going to talk to you guys. I hope you don’t mind.
NON CAR RELATED
So Oppo I have been having a really hard time lately. I recently became single and I am breaking apart at the seams. My boyfriend left me after 4 years of, well I wouldn’t say perfect, but I thought I had found the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I have been struggling to put on a good face around work and friends, but that gets really had when I get home because we still live together. We are both trying to move out, but I really don’t want him out of my life. I really do love him and I have tried going out and seeing other people, but I just end up getting really sad that it isn’t him with me. Our lives had gotten a bit in a rut and I know we weren’t happy with where we both were in life. He blames himself for “ruining my life” and he blames me for breaking his heart. I didn’t mean to do anything to lose him, I think he just thought I was done and one day maybe I didn’t do enough to keep him and he got mad and left. I try going out with friends and I got a second job to fill my time, but it isn’t enough. I keep thinking about him, my mind and heart are broken. I can’t stop thinking that the world might be a better place without me, but I’m too cowardly to do anything about it. Well I don’t mean it that way. I mean I know it isn’t the right way to go about things, but it doesn’t stop the feelings of wanting to, you know? I just want him back, but I think of all the situations I could approach and all I see is utter hate and despair as he laughs in my face and tell me to “fuck off” and hopes I get hit by a bus. I hope none of you are bothered by this. I just always feel like breaking down and crying and I don’t know what to do anymore. Thank you for listening/reading to me OPPO. *edit* Also i am trying to sell off my 928 I bought for him to drive around, but that never got to be a present :(. So if any one is looking I will happily do an Oppo discount