If your Ford had a Matthew McConaughey, it would be a Lincoln

Mitsuoka Is Only Just Killing The Orochi

Hey, remember the Mitsuoka Orochi? Y'know, the Japanese not-really-fast-enough-to-be-a-supercar that everyone puts in their "Top 10 Ugliest Cars" lists somewhere? The one meant to look like a blowfish but also Pamela Anderson's lips or whatever the hell? Anybody? No? Dust? Well, you won't have to soon, because it's about to most honorably die.


Yup, come September, go Orochi, a car you probably thought they killed ages ago (I know I did). To commemorate making the automotive world slightly less ugly, they are going to build 5 "Final Editions" that include exclusive 19" wheels, a chin spoiler, a choice of two colours - either Gold Pearl (up top) or "Fuyoru" (the purpley one) - and a rear wing. But of course, being the Orochi, the rear wing is actually two rear wings that look like they've melted.

Indoors is a rejected interior design for a Covenant vehicle in Halo (or maybe that's just the purple talking), featuring things that aren't the exterior design and thus don't make you want to hurl your internal organs at the screen until the harrowing image goes away. Such things include a pair of pedals, as the only gearbox available is a 5-speed autotragic, mated to a Toyota "3MZ-FE" 3.3L V6 that can only muster 230 horsepower and 242lb/ft of torque in order to shift 1580kg (3483lbs) of bold design gone wrong. Or perhaps it's one of those things that's so bad it's good, like the Street Fighter movie? Hmm......


......Maybe not. At least it turns heads! With a 0-60 time that wouldn't scare a Focus ST at 6.7s, onlookers have plenty of time to form an opinion on that body, which is actually kind of the point of this car. Perhaps it's slowness that's lead to it somehow surviving for 13 years.


Share This Story