...and now we have to find another place to live. (Sorry, Oppo I’m doing these a lot, but I need a place to get this shit out and you folks are nice to talk to). Warning, this is a long one.
Ok so recap on the situation for those that haven’t followed the previous posts. My wife and I sold our house and are building a new one. It’s going to be a long process until the new place is done. My father in law was nice enough to let us live at his place until our house is finished.
Just some background on him, Vietnam Vet, with PTSD, and a whole slew of mental issues. Can be difficult at times, but managable when he is on his meds. Having his grandkids around was actually helping him. My wife, who is disabled, would clean the house as best she could, cook him meals, and pretty much do whatever she could ON TOP OF TAKING CARE OF OUR KIDS.
The past week or so he started leaving the house around 4 pm and we would not know when he would return. He is an adult, he can do what he wants. But my wife would call him and say “Hey dinner will be ready in a half-hour or so if you want to come home and eat.” An hour or whenever the hell he feels like it, he comes back and is all pissy that we didn’t wait. Mind you we still make a point to leave enough food for him. Oh...and he has started drinking again, with a history of alcholism and and DUI things have been going downhill.
Yesterday, I get home and I have to take my wife’s wheelchair to the bike-shop to replace the tubes and tires. Because it is difficult for her to care for the kids while she doesn’t have a functional chair, and due to the fact that her dad is pretty much useless when it comes to helping nor was he home, we go to her mom’s house.
We get the chair fixed and have dinner at her mom’s. Her dad calls and leaves 3 voicemails, clearly drunk -
The TL:DR to all of the messages is basically
I’M PACKING YOUR SHIT UP. YOU GOTTA GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE...
She tries to explain that we had to get her chair fixed and that is why we were not home. But because he was at VA all day and didn’t eat, despite the fact that my wife offered to make him a salad at lunch, he is blaming us.
Of course since he is drunk there is no way to talk some sense into him. We go to a friend’s house after dinner and I try to call hoping I can calm him down. I try to convince him that perhaps there was a misscommunication and because he loves his grandkids we can work something out.
Nope...he wants us out. NOW!
I managed to talk him into just letting me take a few things last night and we will come up with a game plan today (when he sobers up).
At 9 o-clock at night I have to pack all kinds of shit up and take my disabled wife and two kids out of the house. We are staying at my mother in laws for now, which is fine, but not a permanent solution. The house is small, the shower is workable but not really accessible, and we are both stuck on a full-size bed.
So instead of enjoying my Spring Break, I need to find another place to live. Normally, this wouldn’t be too diffiuclt since we are near several shore towns with tons of rentals. But all the homes are so old, none of them are handicapped accessible.
My wife and I decided that even if by some miracle he apologises, we are never exposing our kids to that again.
Now the good news is there are a lot of campgrounds in the area that have some cool bungalos and seasonal rentals that according to the ads are handicapped accesiable. These places have a pool, a lake, playgrounds. All within an easy walk, it will cost some money, but sanity has a price.
If that works out it can get us into the Fall, but those places are closed for the winter, but it could end up being a fun think for the family while the weather is good.
Right now it’s just one day at a time.