My grandpa turns 90 this year. For the past few years, he's been fixated on getting us grandkids to start making great grandbabies for him. He mostly focuses on the female grandkids, especially my cousin who's been living with her bf for a few years. Here's a 1924 Rolls-Royce Silver Ghost Boattail for the year he was born.
My cousin emailed me today that she intercepted a letter from my grandpa, addressed to her bf. It was a 3-page essay on all the reasons they need to get married and start making babies. It is...mortifying. Luckily she got to it before the bf did.
It's such an amazing literary work, that I've copied it in its entirety. I've added emphasis for some of the good parts. And yes, he titled it like an essay rather than addressing it to the bf.
TL;DR - "Y'all need to get married and start popping out babies ASAP before I die."
Some Thoughts on Marriage
February 10, 2014
It is probably rare for a couple to think about the reasons for getting married. I know that I did not think of it in a philosophical sense. Two people fall in love and believe that they would like to spend their lives together. They don't think of the basic drive of love in the Darwinian sense is to procreate. This is too much of a cold psychological motive.
But we wanted very much to have children and to do so once we were married. I can't tell you how excited when (my aunt) and (my dad) were born, and how much joy we had during their childhood years, and teens, and in their achievements in school and college.
Moreover, it was equally joyful when they had children. We did not think that this was the way for them and us to create the next generation and the generations thereafter. Even now we are concerned that our grand children succeed and live the good life. Sustaining mankind is not a factor at all in our thinking. But that's how it works.
Now how does one explain the delay of marriage and children? This is a matter of psychology, resources, etc. Now I was just reading a review of a book in today's Washington Post. Recognizing that libido is the most fundamental drive, why then should two people marry if they have all the sex without marriage? Of course, there are other practical reasons to avoid marriage as suggested above.
But there are also important reasons to have children while you are young. For example, I recognize that it is a good idea to live together for some period to test your ability to get along. We did not have or consider this possibility in our generation. Many divorces could be avoided by having a test period. On the other hand, one presumes that a period of 4 or 5 years should be more than enough to pass such a test.
It has been said that "love is a temporary insanity curable by marriage." Also it has been said that "relationships are a basic human need and that a stable, loving relationship is the absolute cornerstone of human happiness and general well being."
Also, it has been noted that humanity has evolved a strong, physiologically based attachment system that drives the infant to attach to the mother. Children develop one of several styles of attachment that they carry into their adult relationships. The development of secure adults arises from their knowledge that they can count on their caregivers, so they won't obsessively worry that they won't be abandoned by their partners.
One of the features of a long pre-marriage relationship is that the participants frequently take each other for granted. Also, in their daily activities they meet many others who are equally or more attractive than each other. So why should I stick with my present lover when there are others who are good candidates for marriage?
Still another feature is the delay of children. Children are the seal of a good marriage. I have already spoken of the happiness we have derived from our kids—and how that becomes one of the main factors that blesses marriage.
Well, I have said a great deal and have repeated myself. I end this message with our personal hope that we will still be around to attend your wedding.
With sincere respect and hope for a happy and rewarding life,
P.S. - In a practical sense, think of the increase in interest rates as the years go by. An increase of 1% from 4 to 5% over 30 years will be a whopping big number.