My mate's BMW is cursed.

So back in 2013, my mate decided that he would shirk owning a Commodore, laughed at the 'bogan' purchases that both I and another mate had made in the Holden range, and instead upgraded to something with 'class and sophistication', so he purchased a 2013 135i M Sport (not his pictured, but same colour).

Now, he's a reasonable driver. His cars have survived for long periods of time with no damage (except for an errant emu impact at 140 km/h in the middle of bumfucknowhere) , treking to inland NSW for work and back (9 hour drives). But now he's back in the big smoke, so what could possibly go wrong?


In the first 6 months, every single wheel had gutter rash.

By the end of year one both front quarter panels had sustained hits.

Shortly after that his wife touch parked it into a wall.

Not long after that, water was found leaking into the passenger side carpet and dash because BMW forgot to remove some cowling from inside the air vents.

Half way through last year, he was rear ended by a truck when stopped at a red light, requiring complete rebuild of the rear end.

And as of 45 minutes ago, a head on at the petrol station, taking out his entire front end, requiring new new grille, lights and sensors, totalling somewhere in the region of $12k and 3 weeks wait on parts.


So, over the span of it's 2 year life, it's managed to accumulate somewhere in the vicinity of $30k in repairs, for a car that essentially drove 30 km to work and back each day.

Now, he's finally decided that class and sophistication aren't worth the headache, and a 135 is kind of impractical for hauling around two large dogs, and anything larger then a handbag as luggage, so he'll be returning to his upper middle class bogan roots, with his next purchase :


And so another wayward son returns to the fold.

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