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New Age Giga-Growth

Hey, Tesla announced “surprise earnings” by “showing profit” of $100M profit**, comprised of recognition of revenues from Fake Energy Credits of well over $400 Million, plus more revenue recognition from the “release” of Full Self-Driving Software Which Cultists, er, Customers were nutty enough to pay up to $7000 for. I’m still waiting for 2016's Coast to Coast Self-Drive, BTW.

So, for anyone following this “Hyper, Mega, Super Growth Story” here’s a comparison of what Apple’s growth curve (the proxy for TSLA stock supposedly) looked like in the period after the iPhone family launched in 2007... versus what Tesla has done since launching TM3.... they look pretty much identical,. right? Amirite?

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** For those of you “good with the maths” you might notice that, once again, Tesla lost approximately $350 MILLION in their sideline business of building and selling the World’s Finest Electron Propelled Vehicles in the Class of Such Cars Built from Over 8000 Laptop Batteries, which is purely tertiary to their primary business of vending Fake Energy Credits.

*** For those of you really good at the maths, you might notice that, in selling 90,000 cars for the quarter, while losing $350,000,000 doing it-- every car rolled off the line with about $3900 piled on the hood....

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Illustration for article titled New Age Giga-Growth
Screenshot: Tesla Cultists Worldwide Pantz
Illustration for article titled New Age Giga-Growth
Illustration: Statista (Fair Use)
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Virtually identical...

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