NFL Open Thread

Are any teams really good this year? Everything seems a bit off. Every year it seems there’s a team that plows through their schedule and looks like world beaters, only to lose shockingly in the playoffs. This year I could see it happening to either the Patriots or the Ravens, or even both.

I’m a fan of a bad football team. The next paragraph is about them, so feel free to skip over it.

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Know how long I was mad about the Broncos’ painful loss to the Vikings last weekend? About 5 minutes. No, really. Because after stewing about it for that long, I remembered, “Oh, yeah. They’re a shitty football team.” Bad teams don’t win these kinds of games. I saw enough that I’m encouraged by the progress of the young players. Courtland Sutton looks like he’s going to be a gamer, Tim Patrick is showing signs of being a solid option, Noah Fant is up and down but had a good game, Brandon Allen seems like he’d be a solid backup QB for a while, and they’ve found several nifty additions to the defense. I’m ok with Brandon Allen getting the start today in the Allen Bowl against the Bills, and maybe one more against the Chargers if he plays well, but after that they should start Drew Lock and see how it goes. I’m hoping he plays well enough that they don’t have to draft another QB, because they need to draft almost an entire offensive line. As far as today’s game, the Bills obviously should win... but I wouldn’t be entirely shocked if they don’t take the Broncos seriously enough and they sneak away with an upset.

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Here in Denver, we get the Broncos-Bills game early on CBS (boo), and nothing after. Fox is giving us the Seahawks at the Eagles early. I’ll take the Seahawks there. Our late game is... God damn it. Cowboys at Patriots. I want the Patriots to crush the Cowboys. Make it embarrassing, please. Why? Because I’m fucking tired of Fox foisting the Cowboys on us constantly because HURR DUR AMURKAS TEAM. Fuck you. They haven’t been America’s team since the 90's. You know, when they used to win shit? If we’re going to be forced to watch the Cowboys then I want to watch them get beaten so bad that they keep cutting to Jerry Jones crying in his owners’ box. I hate the Patriots too, but at least they’re winners. End rant. SNF is hopefully a good one: Packers at 49ers. I’m not sure who to pick. I think I’ll go with the Pack, reluctantly. Monday is Ravens at Rams, and I’d think it would be the upset of the year if the Rams were to get it together enough to beat the Ravens.

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The rest:

Buccaneers at Falcons - This is a game that is happening today. One of the teams will win, assuming they score more points than the other team.

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Giants at Bears - Ouch. Two games in and not a winning team in the bunch. I guess I’ll go with the old stand by. Home team wins 20-17.

Steelers at Bengals - Still no winning teams! Well, the Steelers will be as soon as this game is over.

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Dolphins at Browns - WHAT IS HAPPENING? IS EVERY TEAM DRAFTING IN THE TOP TEN NEXT YEAR? Wow. I’d love to pick the Dolphins, but I’m going to have to hold my nose and go with the Browns.

Panthers at Saints - I know the Saints should walk away with this one on paper, especially at home. But this is one of those division games that could be more interesting than expected. I’m gonna pick the Panthers.

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Raiders at Jets - I hate it when the Raiders are winning. I’m going to keep hating it after this one, too.

Lions at Redskins - Lions. Fuck Dan Snyder.

Jaguars at Titans - This is the afternoon game I’d rather watch. I think the Titans have the ability to knock the Jags out.

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Chiefs, Vikings, Cardinals, and Chargers are on the final bye week.

Only fourteen teams have a winning record at this point. Man, we’re surrounded by bad football.

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