Copy and pasta:
(Flathead Beacon, 2018)
12:43 a.m. A screaming match ensued in a Kalispell parking lot over a bad parking job.
3:09 a.m. A Columbia Falls man saw a sheriff’s deputy pumping his gas with the engine running. The man wanted to speak to the deputy’s supervisor because that’s apparently a dangerous fueling technique.
8:37 a.m. A vehicle died in the Lower Valley area.
9:17 a.m. A Columbia Falls man faxed the sheriff’s office to say that someone was “trying to frame me.” How or why was unclear.
10:03 a.m. Someone was making some “bold claims” at a Kalispell church.
10:07 a.m. A Columbia Falls man called 911 because his neighbor had not fed his horses or cows in two weeks. The animals were so hungry they started to eat their own waste.
11:59 a.m. A PlayStation was stolen in Hungry Horse and the victim has some suspects in mind.
2:40 p.m. A Columbia Falls man called animal control to let them know that if they got any calls about a hungry horse that it was his. He said the bale of hay he ordered was late, but that the horse would be full soon.
2:59 p.m. A Kalispell woman called 911 and said that while she understands “cats are free spirits,” she was having trouble with a cat in her neighborhood getting into fights with her cat. She was advised to call animal control about the feisty feline.
5:37 p.m. A Hungry Horse woman called 911 because she was sick and tired of her neighbor plowing snow into her driveway.
6:02 p.m. A skier pocket-dialed 911. When dispatch called back to see if everything was OK, the skier said there was no emergency (except perhaps the looming end of ski season).
6:34 p.m. Some “nasty notes” were found in Hungry Horse.
6:59 p.m. A Somers man complained that his neighbor’s “free range rabbits” were wandering into his yard and defecating. Luckily for the reporting party, he didn’t have to pick up the poop because his dogs kept eating it.
7:16 p.m. Two employees at a local Mexican eatery were screaming at each other.
8:07 p.m. Kids got a four-wheeler stuck in the mud.