I’ve been spelunking in Oppo’s Upside Down and it’s a dark/fascinating place. Today we’ll be taking a trip down a rabbit hole of incomplete thoughts, spitballing, flaming takes, and unpopular opinions that never made it to Oppo...
Before continuing on, I’d like to remind everyone that...
... or none of this would be possible.
The front page of this world is filled with silly posts scheduled for the very far future, much like reading the raw post feed. This section is also, surprisingly, shorter than the post feed. Something about the sorting.
Page 2 seems to be where you find all the near-future posts. Questions being posed to the readers on specific days, near future aviation history posts, etc. Later on this page is where the real interesting stuff starts and we begin to drop into Oppo’s collective subconscious.
At this point we’re still seeing things that will probably see the light of day as they’re dated today or yesterday, so I won’t spoil it for you. These are mostly parts of series posts, articles in progress from our most prolific writers, and otherwise likely to be posted mostly-complete thoughts. We’re starting to transition, but it’s slow. It looks familiar, but somehow foreign.
The first interesting nuggets are a little older, starting a little over a week ago, as many of these appear to be truly abandoned. A lot of names you’ve seen a lot of on Oppo start showing up here, particularly very prolific writers, but also some that are clearly timid about contributing to our hive mind beyond the comment section.
- A writer declared that Chinese cars will be wildly successful in the US, whether from Chinese brands or simply built there; that the V6 engine will disappear within 12 years (but every other major variant will be popular at least through 2040); that manuals & DCTs will be dead before 2025; that diesel engines will have a renaissance in North America; and that I may not live long enough to experience a world without gasoline cars.
I’m going to leave this writer out from here on because these posts are never-ending. Lots of lists related to a line of thought that may or may not have become posts. Easily our most prolific writer of incomplete posts, and not just of the shitpost variety.
- A writer wrote a very long post about debugging automotive wiring. It just trails off with a completed paragraph but no conclusion paragraph. I hope they actually post it, because it was very well written.
- A writer put a lot of work into a retrospective on their ownership of a Porsche. I’m shocked this didn’t become a post.
- A writer ranted that we need to stop idolizing car hoarders, but never elaborates.
- A writer started a list of the world’s best supercars, arbitrarily ordered, but gave up a quarter of the way in.
- A writer recounts a sordid tale about their experience with buying a car from CarMax. This seems to have started with a request here for a vehicle history prior to purchase and it clearly went downhill from there.
- One of our writers wrote a great article that inspired the writing of this post! When rooting around in a strange land, they found a number of unexpected things and for some reason never posted about it. Shockingly, this is a completely finished post, unlike many of these.
- A writer explains what’s wrong with Kinja. They also admit to having been tracked down by the FBI because they registered their car. I can see why they never posted these things.
- A writer parodies Dr. Dre with hashtag “#BuyPartsEveryDay”.
- A writer made a very compelling argument about guns, but clearly felt it was too contentious/political to post.
- A writer looks to have been very close to completing the story of their first car, but something kept them from completing it. Their name here is the nickname of their car.
- A writer almost gave us a tale of suffering, loss (serious), stress, then the cherry on top was his 3.5 year old daughter mercilessly crushing all of his hopes and dreams because she has decided that they have more cars than they need. I don’t know about these Gen-Z kids.
- A writer started one of their articles on oddball cars of their area, but this one didn’t get fleshed out, just a reminder that they have seen these on the road in spite of those filthy bureaucrats.
- A writer expounded on the virtues of their Andriod phone and spewed vitriol at those bastard case manufacturers for not making decent cases for every random smartphone, tablet, phablet, etc, on the market. I’d tend to agree, considering there are only something like 65 billion models of smartphone on the market today. There’s no reason any of these should not get all the shiniest cases.
- A writer is sending messages in some incomprehensible alien language to his handlers. I’m not kidding.
- A writer points out that not only are a lot of people stupid, but rich people are dangerously stupid.
- A writer makes many excellent points yet probably feels that even Opponaughts might not understand their anguish.
- A writer wrote about how their mom was car shopping and they were trying to help them find a good small- to mid-size crossover, excluding anything that someone with a pulse could possibly want. I suspect mom bought the pretty blue one or maybe they were too embarrassed to admit that their mom has no taste and hates Toyotas.
- A writer is a time traveler with knowledge of how all life on Earth ends and is disgusted by how big golf carts need to be to tote these enormous modern golfers.
- A writer reminds us of a car we were already aware of, then must have realized that we were already aware of it.
- A writer is clearly dangerous. All I’ll say is: Never to cross them. Ever.
- A writer continues to be funny, even when abandoning some of their work.
- A writer tried to hour rule a shitpost, then clearly decided against it or someone else took advantage of the gap. Shockingly, didn’t post another picture of the type of car they always post.
- A writer is not alone, but they clearly feel alone.
- A writer has a deep and unhealthy obsession with tires.
- A writer dropped a truth bomb about used Subaru pricing and obviously decided it wasn’t worth poking the Subaru bro’s nest.
If enough of you actually enjoy this, I might do it quarterly...