Hi, I’m sarah McLachloon.

Will you be an angel for helpless manual?

Every day innocent manuals are ignoored, forgotten, and neglected, and are crying out for help. Please, call the noomber on your screen and join the #savethemanuals hashtag with a moonthly gift right now. For just eighteen doolars a moonth (only sixty cents a day) you’ll help rescue manuals from dealerships and provide excitement, shelter, thrills, and love. Call, or join online in the next 30 minoots and you’ll receive this clutch disk a phooto of heel & toe in a footwell right now - one that has been given a second chance, thanks to you.

(In the aaaarrrrrmmmms of the angel)

Right now, there’s an manual that needs you. Your call says, “I’m here to help.” Please call right now.